The content from this post was obtained yesterday, where Dr. S was the star of the day with her comprehensive list of rubbish words. Here goes. (I'm bored, really)
Ignore -> Ignol
Heat -> He
About it -> "A-bau-lit"
Facultative -> "Fer-kau-teh-tiv"
Human being -> Human Bean
Respiratory -> Respee
Peroxide -> Poloxide (I like this one)
Bread -> breh (and this too)
Lake -> lay (took me awhile to register
Bottom -> Pock-tom
Surface -> Surfay
Ache -> Eight (YH's contribution)
Chamber -> Chehm-bel
Commercially available -> Comercial available
Yee Hou also told me about his contractor or something tellin his mom in Cantonese "Lei guo tang hou yao Move/moof ga" (Translation: This light has got 'mood')
Dr C wasn't really speaking much that day, and since most of her limited artillery has already been documented in the previous volume, I guess Dr S wins this week, hands down.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Mind Your Language 2
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Luck Matters
Man, it's been a while since I've really made a sensible post, but I promise I'm working on the pictures for the long-overdue Genting post, hehe. Today is without mention, one of the most unlucky days I've had in a while. I started off the day with a round of basketball with my friends, which ended up bad for me since for the 6 or more games I played, my team/teams never won ONE game, and the Sun was blazing hot throughout the whole 2-3 hours too. With the winning point being 7, our closest to winning was a sad and hard-earned defeat of 7-6... Grrrr... Uglier things ensued.. Much uglier
Breakfast venue - Kayu, Aman Suria
I almost rammed my car's ass into some (idiotic) guy who had his one and only whole table placed at the deep end of the parking lot. There're plenty of empty seats, why choose the deep end of a parking lot where he's shielded by another car =_=" While he's stupid for being there, being as drained as I was and driving after that 2-3 hours of toasting , I was to blame for being so blur and hasty. Being hasty I reversed a lil too fast and bumped his table, to which he got pissed off at, resulting in a chair hitting my car's bum (sorry Tmo, strokes side mirrors), though that resulted in no visible damage. Confrontation took place at my side window which included a sincere apology by yours truly. And when he settled back at his place refusing to leave the lot, I parked across instead. Before my meal, I walked to the pissed dude and apologized again, to which he did not reply other than a pissed look-away-because-I'm-cool face -_- Sorry lor, no harm, didn't even spill your drink man. hahah, but really, I owe him one, my bad for being an ass. He stayed on very long with his half finished drink, I stole a photo of him after a big ass car parked the lot beside him, which I think, finally got the message to him - GET THE FUCK OUTTA THE PARKING LOT YOU DUMBFUCK
Red spot marks where his table was initially
Blue spot marks where the bigass car was when he finally moved up the curb
Chair marks the dumbfuck
He's stupid, and I'm worse -_-
Here's where he ended up after shifting
There morals from this incident:
1. No matter how tired or drained or frustrated or impatient you are, drive SAFELY, no shortcuts.
2. I used to think reverse only when it's safe, now I think reverse only when it's 100-fucking percently safe behind.
3. You can't depend on luck.
4. Don't be a dumbfuck.
Friday, February 10, 2006
St. Valentine's Meme
grrr... tan yee hou forcfully tagged me into write a lil essay (theme has to feature a facist/dictator/neo-imperalist leader) for Valentine's day... blehhh.... here goes... figure as i write... i'm so not in the mood to write.. (@#$%^&&^%$#@#$%^ tag....)
The reign of the chinese emperors have yet to end, a reign where happiness was scarce and true love merely a fantasy beyond reach. Young and full of hope, a teenage boy by the name of Zinjian roams the streets of Wudai regularly, always in hope of a mild, pleasant bit of luck in catching a glimpse of the girl of his dreams, Xue Rou, the daughter of a wealthy local businessman.
Zinjian was from a poor family, he had no extraordinary talents that his father could use and his family was greatly in debt to Mr. Hang, Xue Rou's father as he was the one person who helped Zinjian's family financially when Zinjian's late mother was seriously ill, though reluctantly. Zinjian's mother died eventually n his father has been a drunkard eversince, leaving him much to do to pay the debts the family owes Mr Hang.
One day, as Zinjian returned from his usual walk about the streets n from work, he found several armed guards in uniform taking his father hostage.
Zinjian stumbled across the living room immediately to his father n said, "Father, what's going on?" His father only shook his head,not looking him in the eye. One of the guard motioned his hands towards Zinjian and the rest of them looked towards him n took him by force. "Sorry boy, your father's scraped up quite a debt with Mr Hang. We're taking you to the palace,it's cruel, but it's not our fault."
Those were the last words Zinjian heard before he was knocked out cold. When he woke up, he was already out on the familiar streets of Wudai, flanked by the guards that knocked him out earlier. Hands bound with chains, he wondered where they were headed, wondered if he would ever see Xue Rou again. Then out of a blur, he spotted Xue Rou, held back forcefuly by Mr Hang as huge crystal-clear droplets of tears trickled down her scarlet cheeks.
Zinjian thought silently in his head "Am i still in dreamland or do i see Xue Rou crying for ME??" For a moment, despite the circumstances, the world seemed brighter than the sun itself. All Zinjian's troubles seems to vanish upon the very thought that crossed his mind. But, this was probably just what people meant by, the calm before a storm.
101 days passed since that day, exactly the time allocated for a freshly castrated eunuch to heal and begin work in the palace. Zinjian's dreams were short lived, the old life he lead is now only a shadow of the past. He would work with an empty mind,day after day, enslaved to his owner, another of his mutilated kind. Until one day.....
"Zinjian, you are to assist in serving and helping the emperor's new wife.. Another one.. oh bother.." said Zinjian's master. Zinjian obliged obediently with a courteous bow, following the instructions his master provided him with. "You are to bathe her and prepare her for the emperor tonight... it's the first night..." continued his master. Following the procedures, Zinjian headed for the bathroom alone, with little emotion in mind.
He opened the door and shut it behind him with a soft creaking noise. He turned only to face a lady, already nude with her back to him, covering her privates in a very awkward manner. "I'm ordered to assist u with the ceremonies,don't worry, i'm a eunuch", were his introductory line to every lady he has assisted in the same way and this time proved no different. The lady gave a glanced at him with a start, and for a startling moment, both of them were flabergasted.
"Xue Rou?" uttered Zinjian under his breath.
"What have they done to u?" trailed Xue Rou in hoarse shivering tones.
"Hush Xue Rou!" Zinjian urgently whispered as he made his way over to her, trying awkwardly not to look at her naked body.
"What is it, Zinjian?" she mindlessly says.
Alive as he was before the days in the palace,Zinjian suddenly spilled with the kind of vigour he thought he has long lost "Xue Rou, I have to tell u this, the last time i was dragged off, I was brought here to be a eunuch to serve the palace. But, I was lucky. The eunuch in charge of my castration was going to retire to his own village, he skipped his duty n my father paid him a sum to do it for him. He let me off, telling me to watch my step in the palace. He... he mutilated himself instead, before i could stop him.. He left and all that's left was me and the rest of the eunuchs,they took me in and took his... his honour as proof of my castration. I'm not a eunuch, Xue Rou, I'm not."
Trying hard to take in as much as she can from what she just heard, Xue Rou lowered her hands subconsciously and exposed her body to Zinjian, blinking furiously and regaining her awareness only when Zinjian turned away swiftly again.
Xue Rou heaved a sigh and spoke "Zinjian, we have to get out of here. My dad sold me to the palace. I don't want to marry him, i know he's the emperor n i'm to obey his every order but i just can't Bear the thought of sleeping with another man when i already have somebody i fancy -" at this she broke off, flushing tremendously as Zinjian raised his head to look directly at her.
She spoke again,this time soft as a purr "Zinjian, not when that somebody's -" But Zinjian held his hand up to stop her n instead proceeded to clothe her. "I'm sorry about this but we have to hurry Xue Rou", he said through putting clothes onto her. Xue Rou looked at Zinjian with expectant eyes,hoping to catch his. When she's fully dressed, Zinjian said "Let's go. Follow me." Holding all emotion back, Xue Rou nodded determinedly.
Together, they made their way out of the bathroom casually, disguised as the eunuch and concubine that never was, Zinjian, always bowing and holding Xue Rou's hand politely. "I know a way out of the palace just through this route, we may have to fool the guards tho, just play along", Zinjian muttered under his breath. Holding her head high, she made a slight nod of acknowledgement. He guided her to a path flanked with high bamboo plantations, arranged so unvaryingly identical on either side it seems the two side were a mirror-image of one another.
"Here, follow me", Zinjian said as he tugged gently at Xue Rou's hand. At this moment, Xue Rou flushed furiously as she awoke with a mild start from her little dreamland of the two holding hands n skipping in rainbow meadows (hehe). "Just right through that little hole down there,sorry u'd have to crawl tho", continued Zinjian before Xue Rou could mouth her "what?" properly. All Xue Rou did was nod entusiastically as Zinjian ushered her through the hole.
They made through the long,dark crawling journey without much difficulty, only Zinjian bumping into Xue Rou from behind one time too many (hehe). When they exited the little tunnel, they were both equally covered in filth and almost automatically, they both started dusting each other clean. "We must go -" Zinjian was about to finish his sentence when he heard a booming voice behind shouting "THERE THEY ARE!" Shocked,Zinjian grasped Xue Rou's hand tightly and ran the distance of the dark alley they were in, hurriedly away from the source of the voice.
But they didn't stop at the length of the alley,they continued running, alley after alley, street after street, when Xue Rou couldn't manage, Zinjian was there to carry her, escaping the wrath of the palace guards. A month has passed since the day of their escape. Zinjian never got the chance to confess his love for her all this while and today, on the 14th February on the roman calendar, Zinjian was poised to make Xue Rou his. Sitting at a corner in the worn-down hut they found, Xue Rou looked ever so breathtaking, even when she haven't changed nor tidied herself since the time of their escape. Xue Rou looked up and smiled sweetly at Zinjian. Zinjian felt himself bloat with confidence and instantly became the most zealous man throughout the area. He approached Xue Rou with chest held high and bent down over her and opened his mouth to speak " willoobmayin"
"I beg ur pardon my Zinjian?" Xue Rou said cooingly to him as he regained his composure and uttered furiously fast "will you be mine, Xue Rou?"
Xue Rou stopped her smile from flooding across her face and replied "what do u think?" with out losing her composure. and yet.. Zinjian thought her tone was rather suggestive as he felt her legs rubbing into his. *boils* Zinjian needed no more hints, he sunk his virgin lips into Xue Rou's and devoured her whole like a seal does to tiny innocent fishes. That was Zinjian's first kiss, and a juicy,passionate one it was too. "I love u, Xue Rou", Zinjian breathed passionately into her ear. "I need you", Xue Rou moaned back into his, causing Zinjian's back to tingle all over. In each other's tight embrace, they stared deep into each other's eyes, unearthing the emotion welled up since the very beginning, since the times Zinjian roamed Wudai in hope of catching her glance.
~fin~
i didnt wanna continue cuz i think it'll sound like porn, if anybody reading this wants me to i could but... hmmm.. i'll see what response it gets... Happy Valentine's Day! u've been tagged! har HAR!
somehow i knew SOMEONE would LOVE to continue the story.. hehe.. here goes...
The following part is by Yee Hou who will continue my story from where I stopped.
He planted his lips to her mouth, his tongue forcibly prying her mouth open. He explored her mouth with his tongue, tasting the sweet her that he never thought he would have. But now here she was, lying in his arms, making out. He felt horny. Before long, they both realised that he had gone stiff at the appropriate places. “I’m wet dear,” Xue Rou moaned into Zinjian’s ears, “take your clothes off!” Zinjian spent a portion of his hard-earned money on medieval porn and knew the procedures of the fine art of love-making.
“Why don’t you take yours off first eh?” he teased her. His hands found the straps that held her clothes in place. As he was the one who dressed her, taking them off was just a simple reverse process.
He stared at her firm supple breasts. Her nipples were hard with excitement. Her porcelain skin, her willowy body. His eyes explored more. They travelled further south and paused by the clump of bushes. He felt himself go harder. As underwear was not invented back then, the bulge at his crotch was obvious. Xue Rou went forward and put her hands under his pants and started rubbing him. His mouth hung open. He was stunned.
“Close your mouth silly boy, unless you want some oral action!”
He could only nod in agreement.
China, despite its snobbish behaviour, was eager for more knowledge. They imported books from all over the world. The United Kingdom, Nepal, and most importantly India, where the famed Kamasutra made its way into the itchy hands of Zinjian.
“Hakoohefofffixtynai?”
“What?”
“Have you heard of 69?”
“Teach me dear boy, I’m just an innocent girl. Teach me all you know”
Several minutes later, they got on to the real action. He was on top of her and they were kissing. As he slid his erected self into her, he heard a gasp of surprise from her. He could feel her heart beat faster as he kneaded her breasts. Her breaths came in quick, shallow pulses. After several moves, she pushed him off and got on top of him and rode him like a bull.
“Yeah bebeh! I love the way you move in me”
“And I love your taste dearest Xue Rou”
“Push upwards!”
“Ride me faster!”
Moans of ecstasy emitted from their throats. They could feel the love between them, and more than love as well. He felt his loins could not take it anymore. She could feel that he was ready to explode and quickened her rocking. For the first time, he watered her with his thick fluids.
They lay down side by side. They were tired but nonetheless happy. As he held Xue Rou in his arms, Zinjian heard her ask “Can we do it again?”
“I’ll have to rest first and get hard again.”
She just replied by giggling.
“I love you my dear…”
She never got to finish her sentence as Zinjian’s lips were over hers. She felt something hard against her leg.
I hope you enjoyed this porn-ed up version of Jo’s meme. Thank you for your attention.
Yee Hou
turtle : *sigh* -__-"
Wednesday, November 2, 2005
let me try and sound serious... (failed)
hmmm.... alrighteeez... I know no one's gonna be reading this yet but let's jus try and sound serious (sound check) aaheemm... in less than a week (6 days to be precise) i am going to fry my ass in the final exams of my my course (SAM) and here i am fooling around with this turtle's lair of a blog of mine.. hehe.. dumbest part is i aint even half done with a single subject from the 5 i'm doing.. how nice.. Xp "die hard sei ngang" carrot oh carrot.. why la u introduce me to start blogging at such a crucial die hard sei ngang time.. when u already know im usually a last-minute-dude... and turtles dont exactly work really fast.. haih haih... hope i dont forget to study nor forget about the turtle's lair.. anyways.. some weird stuff been happenin lately,let's jus tell a story or two here..
The fall of batman
Ok this took place last nite,but since i'm working on a theme of animals today let's jus put this in.. Ok here i was last nite outside my room spending more time away on the com when my friend horny hou suddenly asked me to get my year book (which i later discovered to be missing) to check out some girl that he said was hot.. hehe.. so reluctantly i crawled off the computer chair and like a lazy pile of slime,oozed my way to my room.. reached room and all the lights was off so i turned it on,looked around and saw no sign of my book.. then i jus lazily dropped on my bed for a moment,lazing while looking on the other side of the bed if there's any sign of the book,but to no avail.. so i lazily rolled off and stepped one foot behind my door and let the other land,ON A FREAKING BAT! the bloody warm furry thing squeaked and moved so frantically at first impression i thought it's a stupid squeaky toy my baby cousin brother left in my room! jeeeEEeZ! That stupid thing bit my big toe as i swung my foot with might,finally able to free my poor foot of it's evil wrath.. jeez.. small lil hole bleeding there... dumb thing landed on the carpet looking so pitiful,can't fly (must've been due to my recent weight gain :D) oopz.. hehe... aihh.. then my dad came home and using a "hello panda biscuit" box, put the limping bugger in and put em outside the house.. jeez...
The car cat
Around this afternoon my sister and grandparents went downstairs to the car,when they suddenly noticed a cat's tail hanging down between the two tyres of my bro's car (wira) needless to say the trio were puzzled by the odd position of the tail thinking my bro rolled over a cat or some unlucky dead cat's tail's still hanging there after some tragic accident involving a car vs cat scenario.. well.. much to their surprise,when my grandpa proceeded to sweep that tail with his leg,a whole CAT (fully intact) dropped from wherever it was hanging and found it's escape frantically -_-" cats....
that's all for today man.. gotta go play games online with ma bebeh :p ngiehehe.. love her lots :p